Saturday, April 26, 2014

"HEADLY CALLS" (POKER) 6

       Back in the very early 80's, Newport, Oregon was a gambling town. Taverns and bars all had some form of social gaming to offer. Games like 4-5-6, a dice game, blackjack, poker and Pan were amongst the games offered. Poker was my bag, however I was known to gamble at the other games, of which I had less of an edge. I was an aggressive player and many feared my wrath. My game was multidimensional, but was still a work study in progress.
       On one late night, after hours, the only poker action was hosted by the Wrangler, a local bar.  Jack, Kay and Jim Briggs all were partners in this after hours game, which was a $5 limit hold-em game with no blinds and a dollar anti. I was playing in the game for a couple of hours and was having nothing go my way. Sitting next to me, on my left, was a great player in his time, named Disco Eddie. Eddie and I got into a conversation about how sometimes, in Coos Bay, he would go get this stuffed toy, he had named juggles and sit the toy by his chips and try to create a new persona for his game. I quickly digested this info and went out in the parking lot to get my creation, which I had named Headly many years ago. Headly was a name that I gave to an art creation, born of clay, that I had formed with my hands, back in the 8th grade. He had a dark look and had one eye, which was an agate I had found on the beach one day. The eye looked real and gave some people the creeps. Sometimes I would say, that's Headly's keeping an eye out for you, just to be humorous. So, I introduced my creation to the group and placed it on the table to my right. What was to happen next, would make poker history.
       I asked if Headly could be dealt in. I told everyone, that he would only call, never raise and never fold. Seemingly harmless and no threat to the game, they dealt Headly in. It was a twenty dollar buy-in, so that's what I purchased, twenty one dollar chips. I then shoved the two cards that were dealt to the head, under it's chin and commenced to play. The flop brought an A-K-6 and the betting began. There was a bet and a call, when it was time for Headly to act. I grabbed five chips, the amount of the minimum and maximum bet, then turned to the better and in an ominous and airy voice said, "Headly calls,"as I gracefully laced the chips into the pot. The lead better, was an old veteran of the game and was holding a pretty big hand going into the turn. The turn card was a 2(duce). With no threat to the hand, the lead better, Jim Fish, a slobbering drunk, whose popularity was way down in the charts, dribbled his chips into the pot. Again, I said, "Headly calls," with an even more threatening witch-like airy voice. The table of players were captivated with my antics and were participating as puppet-like characters in this developing saga, which they were largely part of. Finally, the last card appeared, another 6 hit the river and paired the board, which now read, A-K-6-2-6 of varying suites. The last bet was made and again Headly called and was now all in for the four bets of $5. The hands were revealed and the best hand at the time, was shown to be A-K, big slick, top two pair. Jim Fish was the proud possessor of this big duke, but know it was time to see what Headly's two cards were. I said tauntingly, "let's see what Headly's got Jiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiim," in an expressive and rather challenging voice.  Jim sat just to Headly's immediate right. I quickly removed the two cards from under the chin of Headly, only to flash a 4 for all to see, a nothing card. Now Headly was down to his last card and it had to be a six. The anticipation was killing Fish, so as to make things even more excruciating, I said, "lets squeeze it together, Jiiiiiiiiiiiiiim." I brought the cards closer to both of our visions and slowly started to squeeze the cards. I never squeezed a card so slowly in my life, as then. The top of the number had to be round, not like an 8 or a Q or it was all over, then it had to be wide on top, only a 2, a 6, or a 9 had these qualities. I squeezed on, only to slowly and painfully reveal the top of that rounded card, which then was broken on the right, exasperatingly, I had uncovered a 6 and Jim's jaw lost all muscular control. Headly had been dealt, three of a kind. He had just won his first pot. Jim Fish was destroyed and had to have another drink. He sat drooping and muttering something I couldn't understand, while the game continued on. I stacked Headly's chips and they dealt him another hand. Anytime anyone would bet, I'd would say fearlessly, "Headly calls," as I gazed with piercing eyes, at his betting opponent. Yes, they were under my thumb and in my power, fearing the worst and in turn, having their fears unravel right before their very eyes. Headly drug pot, after pot, after pot. I had built a shrine of chips around my 8th grade creation, it was hideous and now, I was even scolding Headly whenever he called with absolutely nothing. He was totally animated and seemingly alive. What a rush we were all experiencing, by a mere calling station, a clay creation with no conscience or soul. Pretty scary to some, poker phenomena to me. Another stretch of reality, cosmic creativity beyond randomness had been achieved.
        As the game continued, the fearful field of players was now checking to Headly, of which he could only call. I was also with a hand, so when they all checked, I figured Headly must have the best hand, so I bet it for him, from my spot. Pretty cleaver but kinda like cheating. Nobody had a clue, so I continued playing without conscience.  Then, it seemed, whenever Headly was not winning the pot, I was. I got even in a game that I was stuck about $200. Not to mention Headly having a truckload of checkers piled around him, that were still uncounted. Well........ all rushes have to end and Headly's strategy was not working anymore. He was calling with complete and utter garbage and was playing too loose, so I cashed him and myself out. After an hour or so of ferocious play, Headly's profit was tallied up to be over $450. I also cashed out winning chips. Together, with the two cash-outs, I staked claim to over $600 in winnings between me and my counterpart that night. Magical, mystical, mayhem ruled that evening and I'm sure that the people who played in that hold-em game, on that night, will never forget the time that Headly came to town.

       Stay lucky my friends           Wizzzmo       

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